Sunday 17 August 2008

Life, Love, Thoughts, Things.

I am staying with my friend Laura at her house in Bristol and I have been for the last 5 or 6 weeks (big shout out to Nikki and Lucy, her amazing housemates and my new friends, who have opened up their house to me, generous, generous, generous), whilst I work over the summer as a runner at Films@59 , a post-Production company.
Anyway, this blog has come out of many conversations I've had with Laura and a couple of other people about my faith and what people call the Kingdom of God and what community means and how being a feminist fits in to my life and my beliefs, and how to love people better, and how to honour God with my money and how to "Act justly, Love mercy and walk humbly" with my God (Micah, chapter 6, verse 8).
Laura went on holiday on Saturday morning and on Friday night/Saturday morning we were still chatting 'til like 2am about what goodness means and whether chick flicks are bad or good to watch and whether listening to sad songs makes you sad and whether God speaks to me through silly things like Juno and Tracy Chapman and even Sex in the City, and what the Bible says about Transgender issues and is it OK to buy Vogue when I'm trying to care less about what I look like and more about things that matter. I need these conversations. And as I was still talking and she was probably trying to sleep, I remembered a conversation a few days ago when I'd talked to Laura about more of these disparate things and talked about how I write down these thoughts on my computer but never show anyone and how I'd like to start some kind of Christian fanzine about culture and theology and friendship and music and community and justice but I was worried I would just try and make it cool and I would end up censoring myself to sound cooler and funnier and trying to make it look all indie and anyway, who would read it? And she suggested a blog instead (better for the trees, hey?).
And ever since I read a book called "The Irresistible Revolution" by Shane Clairborne (READ IT if you haven't already done so or got sick of me talking about it), I have been talking to like minded people about how to live more ethically, how to take the Bible seriously when it talks about living out justice and acting compassionately and loving people and caring for the poor and the environment. And the thing I have been saying to all these people and the thing they have all said back is "I don't know anyone who's living like this". I have read about people and I know people that are taking amazing and scary steps to do so, but I have no precedent, no model. I don't know what it looks like and I don't work well without someone to copy!
So,this blog is born out of the need for us to pull together and hash this thing out, to work out practically how to do this thing, how to live like what Jesus told us to do actually matters. And I think blogs are a little self-obsessed and, Lord knows, I am a little self-obsessed too, but I need some help and some opinions and somewhere to talk about this with people that are walking the same walk. Because it is easy for me to work out when I'm at my cell group or when I'm talking to Laura or when I'm at Church or chatting to my sisters, but not so easy when I'm away from you all or in Topshop or faced with making life choices.
So here this blog is. Be sparing with your judgement and free with your opinions and ideas and stop me if I get too self analytical. And for the record, before you all get the wrong idea, if I sound to holy holy or self-righteous, please talk to any of my Uni house mates or my parents or well, most of my friends and they will be able to tell you all about how I'm not and how, well, I need your help and that is where this blog comes in.....

4 comments:

Emily said...

great idea with the blog. you write so well, I was longing you to say more! (but I'm sure there's more to come...)
you're about the 6th person who's told me to read the irresistible revolution...so maybe I actually will now!
i'll have a think about some of the issues you've raised and see if there's anything from my life so far that I've learnt that would be helpful to share...

mucky pup said...

Lydia you are amazing. I am really looking forward to reading more...and thanks for lending me Irresistible Revolution :D

Gareth Irvine said...

Love the idea - on your recommendation on monday i went and bought up wesley owen's only copy of the irresistable revolution and took it to starbucks with a grande cappoccino, really got into it, he's really funny as well as having lots of good stuff to say too. Let's get some discussion going at momentum... Amongst the mud...

mucky pup said...

I've been thinking about what you wrote. Please forgive me if this is too self-obsessed.

Ever since I read the Irresistible Revolution its been in my head bugging me. There are so many places where we are told that God is in control and we just need to trust him. This last year I had to trust God and somehow I'm here now thinking, "what on Earth went wrong?" I really tried to give God everything over the year, but now I'm left to decide about uni and I'm not even sure I want to go back. The thing is that loan and the grant are looking really tempting because I'm in so much debt. And I'm away from you all and I'm faced with this life choice. I'm wondering how it came to this.

And then I wonder how God can
'...love this bastard child
Though I don't trust him to provide
With one hand in a pot of gold
and with the other in his side.'

My arms are full of the yearning of Earth; God is holding out immesurable riches...and all I can think of is what you will think of this.

"Sometimes we are so close, I can feel your heart.
Sometimes we are so far apart, I wonder if I ever loved."


What I want is to "Act justly, Love mercy and walk humbly" with my God. But how?